Relationships 101

In Billy Crowford’s interview, he said, “How can you find the right person if your not the right one yourself.” I slow clapped when I heard what he said because it’s true!

Relationships fail because we focus on what we feel instead of evaluating our readiness to be in a relationship.

How will we know when we’re ready? The answer is simple: Pray.

At a certain point, I was scared to ask God about what’s happening my life. But I learned that it is a step for him to lead me towards the right path.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7

What will we be ready for?

In I Kiss Dating Goodbye, Joshua Harris made his choice. He stopped dating until he’s ready for marriage.

Being in a relationship is not just about being boyfriend or girlfriend but what comes after is what matters.

“Single” doesn’t necessarily mean alone; we have our family, our friends, our colleagues and most of all, we have GOD.

God, your creator, already knows whom you’re going to marry before you meet them. Our task is not to discover who they are until we’re ready. We don’t have to worry about anything because he planned it perfectly. Waiting is not easy but we have other things to do before meeting that gift that God wrapped in gold and sealed with love, for us.

While waiting, we have to deepen our relationship with our father, the king of all kings, study his words by heart, and learn to evaluate our choices with wisdom. Through that, we would be able to know and love ourselves better, and radiate that love to other people especially your family and your future wife/husband.

These are the biblical passages on how to be a Godly Men and Women:

The Ideal Wife

Proverbs 31:10-31

When one finds a worthy wife, her value is far beyond pearls.

Her husband, entrusting his heart to her, has an unfailing prize.

She brings him good, and not evil, all the days of her life.

She obtains wool and flax and makes cloth with skillful hands.

Like merchant ships, she secures her provisions from afar.

She rises while it is still night, and distributes food to her household.

She picks out a field to purchase; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.

She is girt about with strength, and sturdy are her arms.

She enjoys the success of her dealings; at night her lamp is undimmed.

She puts her hands to the distaff, and her fingers ply the spindle.

She reaches out her hands to the poor, and extends her arms to the needy.

She fears not the snow for her household; all her charges are doubly clothed.

She makes her own coverlets; fine linen and purple are her clothing.

Her husband is prominent at the city gates as he sits with the elders of the land.

She makes garments and sells them, and stocks the merchants with belts.

She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs at the days to come.

She opens her mouth in wisdom, and on her tongue is kindly counsel.

She watches the conduct of her household, and eats not her food in idleness.

Her children rise up and praise her; her husband, too, extols her:

“Many are the women of proven worth, but you have excelled them all.”

Charm is deceptive and beauty fleeting; the woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

Give her a reward of her labors, and let her works praise her at the city gates.

For the Godly Men
Ephesians 5

Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children 2 and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a person is an idolater—has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God’s wrath comes on those who are disobedient. Therefore do not be partners with them.

For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. It is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. But everything exposed by the light becomes visible—and everything that is illuminated becomes a light. This is why it is said:

“Wake up, sleeper, rise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.”

Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Instructions for Christian Households

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Let us savor our journey towards being the right one for the person that God has prepared for us. Waiting is not easy, but every pain in waiting will be worth it in the end.

I’m praying that every one of us will always be guided so that we don’t need to be an astronaut just because we need space! HAHA!